Perhaps the worst year in recent memory both politically and socially sees America revert to the 1950s- racist, sexist and homophobic- and Britain shoot itself in the metaphorical political foot. And then, just to prove that this year could get more ridiculous, Honey G is releasing an album.
Please tell me I’m not the only one questioning the fate of the world after the year we’ve had? Between Brexit and the Trump election the world is set to go down the toilet. Britain has split itself away from the european world powers in a shocking show of internalised racism that has resulted, amongst other things, in a drastic fall in the worth of the pound, the murder of a young mother and MP- Jo Cox- and a simmering, bitter resentment of the older generations. Why, you ask? Mainly, it seems, because free movement throughout the EU allows skilled and unskilled foreign workers to live and work in Britain. (Not to sound bitter or anything but if you’re losing out on a job to a second language, unskilled worker then maybe you shouldn’t have said job.) Now maybe that sounds closed minded, after all the lies fed to the British people, chiefly by UKIP, throughout the referendum promised more funds to the NHS and a better, stronger, British economy. However, as I’ve mentioned, those were lies. No extra money is going to the NHS. The pound has hit an all time low this year, with the exchange rate lower than it had been in over a decade this June, putting a strain on the economy. In short, everything is going to hell in a hand basket, and just to add insult to injury the first thing the government is going to try to arrange (according to rumours on the internet) is… drum roll please… FREE MOVEMENT. If it wasn’t actually happening it would be laughable.
On top of all that the US has shocked the world, and left many of its residents in extreme distress, by electing a misogynistic, racist, sex offending Wotsit as its president.Well Done. Now I’m not saying Hillary would have been better- I’m not American, I wasn’t there for the campaigning, and I know next to nothing about her career- but I do know that she has never once suggested a) a wall around Mexico, b) sexually assaulting employees or c) making Muslims register in a Nazi-Germany-esque way. So in my books she’s better than the Wotsit.
OK so we’re politically f***ed, the economy is circling the drain and Boris Johnson is now in charge of foreign affairs, how could this get any worse? I’ll tell you how. Our best loved celebrities could all die over the period of a shocking couple of months, only to be followed to the grave by the British pillar of society, the pinnacle of culture and true joy of this miserable country: The Great British Bake Off.
And then, just to prove beyond any shadow of a doubt that we were well and truly screwed, that our lives could not possibly get any more intolerable Honey G… released an album.
But hey, thank God it’s almost over.
Let me know what the highlight (or lowlight) of your year has been
P.s. Here’s a song that really sums it up
[ALL CREDIT OF FOR THIS SONG SHOULD BE AWARDED TO THE WRITERS AND PERFORMERS OF SAID SONG]