Not too long ago a friend asked me why I only want boys, one day hopefully, and I tried to explain. I tried to cram the wide disappointment that I felt as a woman in this world into sentences, and I couldn’t. I tried to explain that the thought of raising boys, even just one, that could understand that disappointment and want to do something about it felt to me like something massive. That raising boys who could cry in public, and wear lipstick or skirts or glitter if they wanted to felt like an achievement. That raising boys who had favourite flowers as well as favourite sports teams felt, to me, like something magical.
Now one day, I’m sure, I’ll write a post about my raging feminist views and general societal discontent. I’ll probably write a post about poisonous masculinity and reel off facts on male suicide rate, and male health, and male heartache. But today I’m simply asking you to share this dream of mine. Go forth and raise boys who are supported. Raise feminine boys, and masculine boys, and boys who go to the doctor because they’re sick, even if they are boys. Raise boys who are a boys, but never put up with boys will be boys as an excuse for anything. Raise boys that respect girls, and boys that respect boys, and boys that respect any and all other genders. Raise boys who respect themselves and others. Raise boys that are religious and boys that don’t give a toss about a higher power. Raise boys that are political and boys that are not. Raise bookish boys, and sporty boys, and artsy boys. Raise musicians, and doctors, and nurses, and teachers, and race car drivers, and bakers, and artists.
Raise happy boys, as far as you can.
And people, on the same note, support the men in your lives. Ask them how they’re doing, how they’re really doing. Help them and support them where you can, and before they ask. Ask them what their favourite flower is and buy a bunch, play their favourite song and dance with them, read their favourite book, watch their favourite movie, let them steal your hoodie. Call them out on their stress, on their self destruction, intervene when you have to. Don’t take anyones crap, and don’t let anyone give them crap either. Buy them a present ( if you can) because you can. Appreciate that society treats us like shit but, at least in some respects, its not treating them much better.
Be kind to each other guys.